CONFESSIONS OF A WEAK BLADDERED WOMAN! Not a secret if you take my classes at the gym. No air jacks for me or I will pee my pants! 4 kids, 1 bladder and no Mastercard to do bladder surgery....you do the math! ANYWAY, Let the confessions commence......
1. Here is a real personal one..... after work outs I smell like a crouton! I don't know whether to gag or be hungry! It's gross. Some girls still smell good after a killer class but I am just going to say I work harder than ALL of them and I am totally NOT jealous or their pretty smell! :) Nothing a little spray can't mask!
2. I want to sing........ a solo......... and make people cry because it's sooooo good and they had no idea I could sing like that! Standing Ovation good! Alas I don't sing. When I do Juliet "shooshes" me....she's 2.
3. One day I will have enough money to fly all the mommies I love to a destination for a mommy weekend and pamper them and we will all wear matching track suits with our names on them and eat steak. There may or may not be a testimony meeting (all religions welcome....no politics just what you feel in your heart.) I think it will be a little like Oprah's favorite things show but on a smaller scale. I will sing a solo there! (I am thinking "On My Own" from Le Miserable)
4. I yell to much.
5. I kill plants. I don't mean to but I don't have a green thumb. Maybe if I watered them instead of Diet Coking them.
6. I secretly (not so secret now) want to live back in Utah....next door to my mom or in a compound with all my friends. No stupid UTAH girls aloud..... you know the kind.
7. I think I would abuse my kids if I moved back to Utah and I had to get them ready in snow clothes, and boots, and gloves and hats, and pack your shoes in your back packs. That makes me sweaty. (crouton anyone?)
8. I have to pee every time I go into a store. You can't take a full cart into the bathroom. You can't pee by your car in the parking lot. All of that adds to the yelling in #4.
9. I don't remember my previous confessions so I am afraid every time I do them I will repeat some. :( (It's probably early onset ahlsheimers)
10. I am always pretty sure I have a lot of things. Cancer, Parkinson's, Lou Gerick's (sp?), MS. In other words I always think the worst. Boo. A head ache is never a head ache. It is a brain tumor. Weak hands are MS and not a crazy hard bicep work out. I have cancer of everything. 2 weeks ago it was cancer of the labia.....turned out to be an ingrown hair, don't worry. WHY would I share that? Because I really want to work on this. 3 days of being OBSESSED with it. Driving people crazy (poor Brandon). Lessening what people who REALLY have these things are going through. Borrowing worry. Don't sweat the small stuff.....it really is just an ingrown hair!